This essay is based on a conversation with Lakshya. It has been processed for reasons of scope and clarity. I was born in Canada to Dutch parents and have lived in Nigeria, Oman, the Netherlands, the United Arab Emirates and India. I spent three years in India starting in 2010. Then in 2016, I moved to Bombay, where I met my husband and welcomed our daughter into the world. They say it takes a village to raise a child, and in India, that is true. People could learn one or two things from the Indian culture of unconditionally supporting families, especially mothers and mothers-in-law, after the birth of a baby. But I would also like pregnant women not to have so many restrictions, that at times they felt weak.
During pregnancy, women are advised not to do much
Doctors tell pregnant women to stay home, avoid exercise, stop walking, stop driving, stop eating certain foods and more. I believe that these restrictions are unfortunate, weakening and based on fear. Many people are superstitious about things and therefore are especially careful during pregnancy, especially during certain events such as a full moon or an eclipse. Pregnant women are also told to avoid raw cheeses, raw vegetables and certain herbs. They generally advise you to cook food and incorporate certain herbs into your diet, such as cumin and turmeric.
I had so much support after the birth
If there is one thing that Indians thrive on, it is family support, especially in the postpartum period. The custom of joint families living together in a house or living with your in-laws when you give birth makes so much sense after you have a child. Families go beyond taking care of a new mother and her baby in every way possible: cooking for them, creating spas, bathing and massaging the mother and baby, and above all, just being there for them for a while. . In India, it is generally recommended to stay home for the first six weeks after birth for a period of inclusion and recovery. It is not a strict rule and it depends on your family and background. I followed it voluntarily, as I felt that it gave me time to recover and my baby to get used to the world.
India has many beautiful customs and rituals for the postpartum period
After giving birth, everyone advised me to eat warm foods, with lots of sugary — raw sugar — and ghee to help cleanse the uterus and strengthen bones. It is also common to make a powder with various kinds of nuts, tree bark, chewing gum and spices to help produce milk.
My mother-in-law made me a smoothie every day with soaked almonds and other nuts, soaked black currants, soaked figs and other fruits to help produce milk for breastfeeding.
The mother, grandmother and granddaughter – a woman hired by many families in India to care for the mother and baby during the 40 days after birth – take on the leading roles as caregivers for both the mother and the baby. baby.
Japa massages the mother and baby daily with mustard oil, which is used to bring heat to the body. Mothers massage for 40 days to help the body recover, the abdomen to shrink and the uterus to return to its normal size. They also massage the baby every day to help his growth, flexibility and joints.
The pocket also helps with all the baby-related chores and even feeding, if necessary.
Family support and having extra hands to help with my baby, cooking and household have played a big part in helping me recover posture both physically and emotionally. It’s also nice to have some company.
